This is una flor de Cempasúchil. In Mexico it is harvested beginning in October and it is used as an offering for El Día de Muertos. Every year for this day in November, I set up a beautiful altar for my grandmother and other loved ones who have passed away. Yesterday as I was watering our nectarine tree, I found this single flower growing. And instantly I felt the presence of my grandma reminding me she is always here, supporting and guiding me, us.
Let me tell you how I knew it was her. The other night I woke up around 1:00 a.m. and my mind just started to think about a few things that have been weighing heavy on my heart. Some relating to finances, another relating to a challenging situation I am experiencing with someone I love deeply.
I could feel my anxiety rising over me like a blanket of fear. I started to do Reiki on myself, but I couldn’t even focus. So I started to repeat myself, “I am supported and provided for. I am supported and provided for. I am supported and provided for.” I imagined all the vastness of the universe. The stars, the planets, the billions of miles between me and another star and all the possibilities that exists in that space. All that the energy of life already supports. I felt my body begin to surrender and relax.
A shift happened for me that night. For the first time, I realized, that I really believe deeply that I am being supported by life. I was no longer saying it to convince or reassure myself. I understood that night that all along I have been supported by life, and I just have to trust her.
In fact we all are. Everything in the universe is always conspiring for us, we just have to listen, pay attention and trust. When we are aligned and attuned to the energy of life, we are able to tap into her power and receive her abundance and blessings. This doesn’t mean that we won’t struggle, or feel doubt and uncertainty. What it means is that when these waves of challenges come over us, we have to be able to access a deeper part of ourselves that is not connected to the immediate circumstances, but rather is connected to the soul of the universe. This part of us is the part that fuels our trust and a deep knowing of well-being.
Pema Chodron wisely states, “The truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and fall apart. They come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy.
Seeing that flower, I felt like my grandma knows what I experienced and is telling me, “Yes, mi niña, you are being supported.