Bits and Pieces

May I know my curse; May I know even better, my blessing

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I learned that the things we want can come into our lives as a blessing or a curse. Let me give you one of the many examples that have helped to teach me this lesson:

A few years ago my David and I decided to let go of the home we had “bought.” When we decided to walk away from it, a huge burden, we didn’t even know we had, lifted. There was a sense of liberation from obligation, constraint, and debt that was lifted. Yes, owning a home was a desire we had, but so much of our money was being consumed by that home, whether it was mortgage payments or improvements. In our hearts we wanted to take long road trips, discover the world, make room in our lives to live. We rent now. The burden of a huge mortgage payment doesn’t linger over us. The house is not ours, but the home is. Most importantly, our life is ours. We have time to dedicate ourselves to what we love, to enjoy nature, to travel the world, to take time to be with the people we love. Not having a mortgage allowed me to explore other careers and options in my life I otherwise would not have done.

Would I like to own a home one day? Absolutely. But a few years ago, I learned the things we want can come into our lives as a curse or as a blessing. The house we “owned” before was a curse. We were exhausted, distant, always catching up, stressed, and overcommitted. Subconsciously, the house had become our focus, not our relationship and interaction with each other, and certainly, not our commitment to personal growth and healing.  We thought if we could improve our house, we would improve our lives. If we could sustain the house, we would sustain our family.

Now, we see ourselves as stewards of the home we live in. We see it as an extension of ourselves to share with and support others. A place of community and engagement for greater ideas and actions. A week ago we welcomed activists from Honduras to stay in this home, and it was such a beautiful gift to us. Everyday this home feels more and more like a blessing. I am learning to only welcome things, opportunities, and people in my life when they come as a blessing. And how do I know when it’s in a form of a blessing?

Because I feel more alive!

Because I feel connected!

Because I feel abundant!

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